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The Two Faces of Commitment: Commitment in partnership will grow when partners witness personal dedication and commitment to their relationship

Pre-marriage programs, inventory workshops and enhance programs for married couples, each consider the true meaning and purpose of commitment.

Commitment is crucial and an essential ingredient in the recipe for marital success, relationship satisfaction, as well as trust in longevity. Commitment is pledging yourself to each other by word, action and giving up or making choices. However, couples often struggle with commitment due to disenchanted, resentfulness, experiencing conflict or having ‘grass is greener’ visions.

When couples stop acting on commitment in their relationship, they can get off track (something we never dream of when we first get together). The success of a relationship is a strong sound friendship with our partner and we need to stay deeply committed to each other and the partnership so that we can continually build a strong emotional bank account.

What Grows Commitment?

Commitment in partnership is a dynamic force and it will grow when partners:

  • Enjoy being together;
  • Each feel appreciated, loved and valued;
  • Witness personal dedication and commitment to their relationship; and
  • See their partner investing in their relationship and when they too show investment.

In most relationships, commitment can be looked at as a symbol of security; when they share a deep sense of security they will feel safer and are more willing to show and strengthen their own personal dedication. So what are the keys to staying personally committed?

Making the right choices for the relationship and your partner:

  • Making your partner and your relationship a priority! This means you have to say no to some people and other responsibilities.
  • Choose to show personal dedication – make “we” choices and see the positives in your partner more often than scanning for the negatives.

I believe we can expect great things in our marriage when commitment, love and skill work together. Sure, there are times in our lives when we have to concentrate on some of these areas specifically or seek support to help us overcome challenges but with support and understanding, we can all enjoy the blessings of a strong and committed partnership.

I hope these tools prove useful and help you enrich your relationship. If you would like further reading on commitment, please contact me on 4979 1370 or

by Robyn Donnelly
Co-ordinator, Marriage & Relationship Education CatholicCare and Secretary and NSW Representative MAREAA.

Marriage and Relationship Education is a learning opportunity, much like you would do in any other important life event. Check out the video for couples on YouTube: Keep up with the latest from the MAREAA online:

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